29.04.04, Thursday ~ Hyped factor: 7/10

wah.. dunno is -_- or having fun changing nick over at msn... my 'brudder' put me
as beCUMmer -_-" see he so horny... worst, he un-acknowledge me as brother... sadz.
lolx... 'best' not there liao so i guess, i'm better off as a dirty joke teller? tt reminds me
of who i was when i was in my upper sec. had to be funny to fit into the grp. making pple
laugh like become my part time job. after all the laughters.. i looked back.. how many
actually stayed to laugh with me... or even make me laugh. hardly. i may be laughing
but whether u are really cheering me up anot? its hard to tell. till now, i realise i haf
not laugh at other pple's jokes tt much... i've been laughing wif my friends
at my own jokes. gosh. i'm really sick.

but making pple laugh is a feat. u have to ensure the jokes u say are not too lame.. not
too chim (or u find urself laughing while others still figuring out wat u say)... and i hate
to explain jokes... really kills the mood. i think i'm so used to be teased when
i was young.. now whenever i tease pple the girls wld say 'eee.. u so mean'. dunno y
perhaps i'm sick... teasing pple. well i think only peihuan n diana would understand
whats in it in a tease. well.. tease can work both ways... i only noe by teasing ph, i
haf motivated her and push her further... always out to challenge her... thru putting
her down she always swear to prove tt i'm wrong... i used to tease her tt she's fat,
flabby.now? she always get napfa gold... so pple, teasing does not equate to degrading
the person -_-"

i'm not stressed but why am i not laughing my heart out? i'm not myself...
someone save my life tonight... latoya london

in the meantime i shall try to smile?
Me: wat happens to the best?
Z: u cum it out liao lolx