..:: 360. The One With Liquid Room ::..

yesterday night was shiok. went to liquid room for the first time. comparing the music from chinablack, phuture and liquid room, i think the latter still the best. started dancing the moment i went in till i left. Lots of grinding, the girls there were daring... of course the ratio of guys to girls was like 15 to 1. there were a few irritating couples... they love to hold each other, wiggle downwards and upwards. sometimes when they wiggle downwards, i felt like sitting on their heads... but their shots were good too, too bad cant exchange for a jug.

















christmas deco at orchard road:


oh ya just read abt some military pix posted on the blog, have to be more careful what i post next time. thanks jason for reminding me.

some interesting pix...

my wing SM... idling...



one of my chao-beng instructor... who degrades male dancers as being gay 0_0 plain shallow.



P.S: i think he looks more gay here. sir, it's just a needle...

..:: 359. The One With Course Closing ::..

well... my course (reads: engineer officer cadet course) has officially ended. Received my cert and took a course photo on friday. not much to say but lots of pix to show... can log on to the website stated in my intro on msn for more pix on crescendo. had my last interview with my instructor... wish i never had that interview... cos my friend and i both had the interview at the same time and were both disappointed. We were both fighting for sword of merit but then it was hard to get cos for field engineers 2 out of 30+ people get it. Plus they need to give each specialisation one SOM, like armour, bridging, CBRE, EOD... but each of them is like 1 out of 7-9 will get it. what are the chances? haiz... we were not happy with the ranking they gave. we were both damn pissed. screw the assessment system.

sian, shant talk abt it... make my blood boil. just disappointed with the course after so much effort has been put in. if they send me to infantry pioneer, i would say FU :)

I am confident where i stand, i know who should be and qualify to be my competition.

c",) here are some of the pix i took when i went for a red cross event today. It's my junior birthday!





how the parade square looks like:



All the cadets:



c",) some of the hand picked pix from my album...

de-kit our store:



my buddy and me:



my best friends:



rainy day in SOCE, ETI:



my garang platoon doing PT during free time:



last few days, everyone went nuts. dao pok!



ripping underwear:



Sword of honour not spared:



something the e-mart auntie gave us on our last day:



platoon 2, section 1:



jason-the-craig-david and me:



chong han, fish and me:



Heavy!



Edmund john and me:

..:: 358. The One With Home Sweet Home ::..

yay, so glad to touch down singapore again. this marks the end of my training phase for my professional term. time flies and the whole journey was filled with lots of emotions.

for the overseas exercise, i did not get any appointment, to my disappointment. there was a change in the appointment list cos CO thinks priority should be given to those who have not been assessed and those who were in the bottom few. For the matter of fact, i did not get PC role for even local summary exercise which made me ponder whether am i still a contender for sword (merit). They knew i am fighting for it and even encourage me but the fact i did not get any important appointment made it hard for my peers to evaluate me. Seriously, i am pretty confident i am good enough to even fight for sword of honour, just that i didnt have the chance.

pissed. brought up the matter to my OC and he refused to answer how the assessment scheme is like. Talked to one of the majors but what i got was that i confirm pass the course and did well. But problem is i'm not looking for just 'well', i want to know whether i can get the sword. Just like talking to OC, i told him straight in the face i know i confirm can pass... the rest were stunned. -_- i mean come on la, at this stage if you still dunno whether you can pass, something must be wrong.

took lots of pix for the trip.

http://photobucket.com/albums/c301/saiyok/



platoon 1 cadets with OC



beaver venture, we basically walked for more than 60km in full battle order. Had 4 missions to complete. Limited rations-until one person 1 biscuit for breakfast.



bunk in sai yok camp



platoon 1



with our wing SM, ah choy



floating market



zoo. yay.



wax museum



my packet IC.



me with 2 going-to-ord personnel

..:: 357. The One With Ex Crescendo ::..

Hey guys by the time u read this, i'm in thailand :)

Arrival to Singapore: TG 8194, reach at 0315 14 Nov

lol no need to pay airport tax. my flight is at 415am. yawnz...

..:: 356. The One With Pre-Crescendo Syndrome ::..

mmm... had a chat with my senior instructor... shld haf talk to him earlier can get more insights. i was told i'm getting a 'very impt' appointment... wah exciting but nervous... and my sir wanted to talk to me personally whenever i can spare the time. wow. finally i felt important... everyone around me seems to know what they will be getting. definitely a morale booster hearing from my sir that i cannot let them down. but higher expectation = more stress

i can do it

oh ya forgot to give some survival tips for a more enjoyable time in ZOUK.

10 rules of Zoukasutra

1. Stand near the ceiling fan
2. Never go all the way into the crowd (near neon board), you can hardly get out if you need to go toilet
3. Your feet should be as wide apart as possible without compromising your comfort (if not you wil find yourself resort to vibrating)
4. For guys try stand near girls, in any case you can resort to the lowest form of vibrating but yet find yourself grinding instead of rubbing with some 'simply-cant-dance' guys.
5. For girls, beware of guys who will grind you from the back. lol. turn and face him for best effect, under normal circumstance, he will retreat and give you space. however provided he wont ask you 'how's the air down there' *grins*
6. Work on hip thrusts (for girls: you got nothing to lose. for guys: something new other than those horrible back thrusts or rather slams)
7. The only way to create space for yourself is to stop cursing under your breath and start hip + back combi thrusts. It works ok! Sorry for those dancing around me, i bet they kena blue-black.
8. Move at the correct rhythm and not excessively. Some guys really look like they are having fits.
9. For guys: Drinks may make you high but try to keep your 'orgasmic' looks while dancing under control. A real turn-off even to the people ard u.
10. Club more! your endurance level will increase. :) It's all about having fun with your friends

went to the prata house with my bmt buddy for supper :) as usual spent 14 bucks and gd time :) air force is really different. he's going to KL for his leave -_- while i am going thailand for exercise. will see him on 21 nov when we all go back to ocs :)

now spinning:

craig david's
johnny
unbelivable
hypnotic
all the way

madonna's hung up

sean paul's we're be burning

of course stephanie sun's new album :)

some funny flash direct translation 'mouse love rice'
with some really broken english

http://myweb.hinet.net/home7/dreamweaver/mouse.swf

dun wan to make my entry too lengthy... so lyrics in url

johnny
http://www.songlyrics101.com/lyrics/C/Craig%20David%20Lyrics/Johnny%20Lyrics/

unbelivable
http://www.lyricsmania.com/lyrics/craig_david_lyrics_2919/the_story_goes_lyrics_15317/unbelievable_lyrics_177882.html

..:: 355. The One With Zouk Outing ::..

hee... zouk was damn fun. music was good and it has better ventilation than chinablack. renovation was well done. so definitely can catch me there a few more times. Shots were good too :) We left at about 3am then head to Geylang for some supper :)

waiting for cab at Far East





strangely when we met up with the rest, all were wearing white except for one la



dou jiang you tiao



the last place we went before we left



how i got these pictures? i bought a new camera! lol.

..:: 354. The One With Assumption of ETI ::..

this week was super 'waste-time'. less the appointment ceremony and trying to interact with the coporals joining us for crescendo. i got leave on monday as you guys knew and after the prayers i had a 9-course lunch at crystal jade. damn good food. but booking in with a full stomach sucked. first thing when i went back was to have arms drill (aka marching and drills with rifle that is). kinda cool our wing sergeant major made us flip our rifle up and catch with one hand.

mon night, the instructors announced our exercise platoon and the admin appointments... mmm... should i say i was happy and sad? yes got into platoon 1 which seemed like an all-star platoon cos all the capable people were all in platoon 1. but then i didnt get any admin appointment which i was quite disappointed. people thot i was crazy craving for an appointment when many were praying to 'siam'. Being admin appt holder got advantages... firstly u know all the stores each platoon should have so u can estimate how the obstacles gonna be be like, how many and types. secondly u can get to know the coporals earlier and closer rather than now i only know one section :(

tue-thur basically parade rehearsal for thur evening's assumption parade. School of combat enginners and division engineer training centre, both standing down and a new Enginner Training Institute (ETI) will emerge.

but parade that day kinda screwed up last part cos of the commander... we were told not to execute if its a wrong command but it was do-able so some did some didnt... and the march pass was horrible cos people in front followed the music... people at the back got timing which was off...



that was 39th SOCE anniversary... find that place familiar? we were in pumping positions at sentosa! arghz... but that day was throwing all the instructors into the water and ripping their underwears... OC got thrown so every instructor had to go into the water too... we almost ripped OC's erm... lol

more pix to be uploaded...

..:: 353. The One With Apply For Leave ::..

ooo... had a scary encounter with OC or at least his sms...
actually i mentioned about applying leave to my instructor a few weeks back but i think the instructor forgot and i didnt remind him :( the leave was for my late grandmother's prayers 49 days after her demise.

OC: Why so last minute! prayers are not made known at e last minute. Its a discipline that all military personnel must adhere to ask for leave at e earliest possible opportunity. Why have this not gotten into e cadets head! explanation?


hmm... scary huh. i read that i also got stunned. but the fact i did tell the instructor long time ago. OC meant well i guess... in the end he still gave me the leave. but i will miss the appointment ceremony :(

..:: 352. The One With Chinablack ::..

well its the weekly update :) kinda shiok knowing i only have wed-fri left in the week. wed was laidback cos we had leadership lecture by one of our favourite officer, MAJ Low. Thur we spent on revision on our drills which i found useful but spending the whole day was not very fruitful. Nothing beats having yourself doing the planning, running through the thinking process, rather than having people who done the missions to talk about them. Our levels of preparation are different and very likely those who have done the missions would mindset us by telling us how they went about doing the mission. I rather they mention the planning considerations...

oh well, as usual cadets are always tired and sleepy... even though we have 7 hrs of sleep for both days. people still dozed off during lectures and i think we kinda pissed the senior instructors. haiz. anyway not many people can fight the after effects of a heavy meal :)

Fri was fun, knowing that we had a 5km fun run at Seletar Camp for formation cross country... kinda sad didnt get selected to rep in a team... We came in third. One of our instructors got tortured by us as it was his birthday and singing birthday song at about 5am was something new. Then we had a course gathering at Marina South. Had some sort of amazing race, my station was pretty cool... seeing people get frustrated setting up dominoes... had a game of bowling... then had steamboat ...

after that went home and got changed for clubbing. lol. 2 mths no clubbing, had to go this week before we fly off to thailand next week. Boy it's really chinablack yesterday. crowd was not there, music was so-so. shall boycott chinablack soon... my friends thinking of zouk today... but harmful leh... both to the wallet and body...

ok. shall take a nap and then type notes... again? ya, no life man. perhaps got time can read my principle-centred leadership. ok, say anymore u guys might think i am crazy...

oh ya something shocking happened to me... Disclaimer: you may get disgusted. It happened after the cross country run.

me: anyone wants a drink? (holding 2 packets of soya bean milk)

KX (my friend): har? got any other milk? any other milk also can.

me: then you want hazelnut milk? (Hazel is a female secretary from manpower branch sitting under a tent)

my OC: wah, siao eh, hazel ni dou yao? Eh, she's attached liao la (taking his car key from one of the cadets safekeeping for him)

me: (still in shock)

my OC: (walking away) but she's not married, you still got chance

me: (looked at the rest around me, still in shock)

After that episode, hazel under the tent looked at our direction. How i wish i could bury my head into the ground like a borehole drive.

OMG! now OC probably think i'm a dirty freak. lol.

..:: 351. The One With Weekday Bookout ::..

orchard road was empty...

went to watch 'Deuce Bigalow'. rather lame but funny show. worth 7 bucks but nothing more.

then to borders and bought 'principle-centred leadership' which is a pretty cool book :)

had a super fulfilling dinner at marina square-changing appetite with shannen, satu kosong and angeline :) missed those plain talking crap sessions. learnt coffee appreciation and lots about customer service :P

concussed till 11am and continued doing up my notes... kinda weird having to do notes even in army... well no pain no gain, i do want a sword after all :)

recently bought



a much better album than the last. very laid back songs... if want to buy go PS music junction... 9.90 only and original!!!

Hee.. here's how my RSM rank looks like



weekend bookout what should i do? sleep more perhaps... and learn my dance for comms ball :)

..:: 350. The One With Ex UNICORN ::..

Kaoz... so long never update... Have to go way back...

Before Ex UNICORN started, i had to retake SOC... the other time i got 8:10 but water bottle leaked. damn du-lan. but luckily this time, i got 7:51, my PB considering obstacles in SOCE much tougher due to the adjustments.

Ex UNICORN was more exciting than MUSANG... firstly, we had an enemy platoon... Duno whether am i unlucky or it was on purpose that they put me in platoon 1, its kinda farked up... store inspection, my platoon got to load and unload all the stores inside the tonners for 4 times cos some stuff were not arranged up to standard.

slept at 1+ and had to wake up ard 5 cos i was advance party. sian. the deployment phase almost killed most of us. For the first time, i felt so breathless and the sun didnt help at all, it made the weather even worse. on the verge of evaporation...

halfway throught the deployment phase, i was called out to be the runner to the next PC. According to the trend, those who are 'runners' would be PC for the next mission. With that, i was feeling weird for the rest of the day, anticipating what mission i had to undertake. Being a runner to a PC whose mission was to clear obstacles enemy has set up was a siong task. had to run around following the pc when most of my platoon mates could at least rest and take a nap while waiting for their turn to clear obstacles. Got screwed a few times cos i was not briefed properly the job of a signaller (aka runner). The signal set i carried had a long antenna that kept hitting people around me.

the mission was kinda disastrous... PC not very sure of navigating and section comd dunno how to clear the obstacles properly. The first obstacle we got stuck like 6 hrs, damn ridiculous. The instructors did their very best, i think, to 'kao-bei' and scream at us throughout the mission. It was a mentally shack mission as we started clearing obstacles from midnight till the next day 4pm! No sleep! Worse,PC and i didnt bring along our ration so we had to share with others. Then after everything, we had artillery bombardment so had to run for 1 km+ with casualties whom we had to carry and run along with all our equipment. almost died.

When the 2IC read oout the appointment for the next mission, i was surprising not the PC for the next mission but a section comd. I was relieved yet pondering why i was not a PC. My mission was to set up minefield which turned out to be disastrous too...

The other two sect comd were PCs of platoon 1 for minefield camp a few weeks ago and that infamous platoon 1 got to re-do their minefield for 5 times. Hence i was the inexperienced one. Damn frustrated with one of my course mate... after having done so many minefield, there was this traffic line which was supposed to be marked out by him. Instead, i ended up marking and got screamed at by him (???) for marking the lane so slowly that he could not set up his sector.

I almost died of shock from my sector. We dug fast enough with help from others but aiming of mines was shocking. firstly, i gave them sandbags of mines for their particular row, instead they used them to reinforce other rows. Secondly, they didnt tell me which holes they didnt lay the mines due to waterlogged areas. Hence, i had difficulty in accounting for the number of mines and the location of every mine which were critical information.

safety line was not removed by one of my pioneer which happened to be from platoon 1 (*faints), i think they too shack. In the end, we went to clear the white tape and as a section commander i got screwed damn badly for it.

Instructor: did you ask your pioneer to go into the minefield to clear the white tape even after warrant choy asked you not to?

Me: (feeling doom's day coming) yes sir

Instructor: £%$"% Do you know you have risked the life of your pioneer just to cover your ass? Who is going to be responsible for it? How are you going to answer to his parents? loved ones?

Me: (still feeling stunned)

Instructor: Recite the officer creed

Me: ...

Instructor: i lead my men by example. i answer for their training (??), morale and discipline..... i serve with pride, honour and integrity (??)... I will overcome adversity with courage, fortitude and determination (??)

Me: (thinking) he must have thought i asked my course mate to clear the white tape so i would not be scolded... but he was wrong... it was a common consensus among my section that we should clear the white tape. It was a mistake we realised and wanted to correct but in the end i was thought not brave enough to admit mistake??

Instructor: So u tell me should i pass you from this course?

Me: (eyes wide open)


after a long talk, i was finally let off.

After setting up of the minefield, we had 1 hr + to rest till it was about 5am, we were made to fall in. Then they read out the appointment for the next mission which was the live arming of mines.

PC for platoon 1 (+ enemy platoon): OCT Chong Chor Ming
PS for platoon 1: OCT John Chen



stunned. again.
I only got 45 mins to gather all the stores required and get the whole platoon convoy going. It was kinda messy cos most of the instructors were sleeping in vehicles and i had to get everyone to shout for the instructors.

forgot a few things like field latrine and signal set. but luckily the conducting was a nice guy... kinda happy when my chief instructor praised me for being forward looking... the convoy movement was smooth and i was glad everything went smoothly. The effects of mine were jaw-dropping.

Then we went back to recover the minefield we laid. It was a frightening experience. The instructors went around the minefield to check our positions of all the mines... Lucky he didnt come to my sector... i think he would faint if he saw my sector.

We reached back our wingline around 3am+.

tue. supposed to have half day off but dunno why eaten up. While moving stores with one of my platoon mates, he got a bad cut that ended up a mild fracture on his finger cos 5 x 1.8m iron picket dropped on his hand. was disappointed with one of my course mate who asked me not to report to the instructors cos they think they can handle at our level. It proved to be wrong. My friend had to be sent to TTSH for scan. Before the CO evening that day, all of us were called up to the discussion room and had a serious lecture.

fri. it was SOCE anniversary at sentosa. had a great time playing volleyball and eating... suddenly we were made to fall in and pumping postion at the sandy beaches.. damn malu... we were told by our OC to throw all the instructors into the sea. then later one instructor went bonkers and our task was to rip of underwear of all the male instructors. sick but we all had fun. it was a day of 'bo cheng hu' aka no government.

sat.sun.it was live firing for marksmanship... sadly, my shooting skill dropped. too long nvr shoot liao. shall try next year. 200 bucks... haiz. now really nothing to make my no 1 nice except IPPT gold badge.

i was the RSM (range sergeant major) for second day. wah the men really made me puke blood. damn slack and attitude problem. had to shout at them. lucky i love shouting at people, if not OC see liao confirm think pioneers can climb over my head. was damn pissed with my wing SM. i am the cadet RSM so i got the initiative to task organise the whole range on how to clear the range... instead he told me off and said i didnt follow his insructions. damn fume sia.

anyway, just glad i got my monday and tuesday off. must catch up on sleep liao. i think my life has been shortened quite a bit for the sleepless nights and stress. Almost everyone experienced foot rot, aching body...

kinda excited who will be the CWC for Ex CRESCENDO... cos the person will bring the cadets and coporals 100+ together to thailand and then see the whole EOCC commissioned... damn memorable and shiok la... somemore the person would be fighting for sword of honour... i am hyped up man... :)

..:: 349. The One With Ex MUSANG ::..

*concussion charge*

This week was super super physically demanding... Mon had landmine warfare test which i didnt get to study cos i didnt bring my precis back and i spent the sunday night cleaning my personal stores... Kena singled out for dirty entrenching tool... haiz. but luckily my test i got 91%. damn happy, first test over 90% :)
then it was moving stores, lots of concertina wires and lots of pickets...

tue. We had a SOC test, oh well came in with my PB of 8:10 considering the obstacles here are tougher than anywhere else i have taken and 5 secs off my previous PB should be good enough. However, i was kinda disqualified for a leaking water bottle. haiz. suay lo. but nvm shall take again and hope can get sub-8 :)

it was also the start of camouflage and field fortification . Build quite a number of obstacles and had to samula some cos we didnt meet the timing... By the time we built the last, we already all 'slow-mo'. Can really faint under heat exhausation. We only had like 5 mins rest in between each obstacles. The whole lot was punished for our slow movement... now had to double up whenever we go... damn sian, had to run around the area, shift stores here and there. slept late somemore :(

wed. we got to camouflage vehicles. Had to re-do 2 times till we met the ten minutes requirement. The end product was damn good and we took a pic together with our instructor. :) That was not all, we had a mission to build obstacles to protect installations... Started around 1500 and ended around 1800. Had debrief and taught us crossing of contaminated area, abattis, etc.

When we got back camp, our 2IC announced the names of the appointment holders of Ex MUSANG. I was pioneer again. Both platoon was mixed...

Got to sleep ard 0000 as usual.

thur. for men, we basically packed and loaded stores and had inspection. for the PCs was a day of planning and approval of plan. my day will come :)

fri.Our first mission was tactical deployment... The weather was so hot i thought i was evaporated... Had to dig a shellscrape (Note: a rectangular ditch for me to prone in it). was rather a ok siting cos i got to overlook scout camp rather than just vegetation. On the other hand, i got to dig out lots of creepy crawlers, centipedes, millipedes... Dig halfway found a concrete slab so haf to re-adjust... then dig till the middle part found a long metal pipe embedded. *faints*

throughout the day, we just kept building obstacles for preotection, camouflage vehicles and preparation for block mission the next day. had rehearsal till 2am then sleep for a while.

sat came so slowly... 5am we were packing our stuff ready to go. we started our block mission around 6+. Had to run with our packs... some had jerry cans which hold 20 litres of either water or flammable stuff. we ran for a long distance. i mean very long. got to experience the power of explosion that i missed during the live firing... man, hot stuff. so loud and the wave that i felt.

sun. we started our retrograde ops around 1700 on sat. All of us were shagged... I remembered we all took naps between tonner rides to varius vehicles... At 1am i finished setting up wire obstacles, by 2+am i was laying mines, and 3+ agAIN, 4+ i was laying mines, closing obstacles... by 5+, the mission ended... then we had to go back to retrieve everything. damn sian :(

came back to camp in the morning and got to book out by 3+pm. We had to go back one the next day to wash our stores :) gd move i must say. can at least concuss like me from 8pm to 6am.

must do lots of reading up and preparation. EX UNICORN is our summary exercise and confirm i kena appointment dis time... nervous sia... wish me luck :)

..:: 348. The One With Course Gathering Pix @ ECP::..


part of the game... pic with a girl



here i come... finishing line


then came my team with bicycle...


our infamous gasp


something off topic that i want! NANO...

..:: 347. The One With Survey ::..

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to obedience and warmth. In love, you feel the most alive when everything is uncertain, one moment heaven... the next moment hell. You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic. Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

..:: 346. The One With Aftermath ::..

Sun sept 11, went to padang like 4+ am... cos i tok a cab with my friend who participated in the competitive 21km. We were made to run the 12.6km. so angry... not because i dun wanna run... i wanna run 21 km instead! arghz...

perhaps first time running such long distances, my heart had irregular beats a few times throughout the race... i kept on going... and wasonce again pleasantly satisifed with my performance... came back one of the earliest... and never stopped throughout the race :) while most people bua-long-long (daringly: if there's such a word) strolling to finish line.

i didnt feel good when i first saw my coursemates... perhaps i have been away from some time and luckily i saw many of my bmt mates who were there :) most of them got monday off for running the race, well our prog so packed so mon off is definitely out of question. when i went back to camp on sunday night, i realised we were supposed to have half a day off but apparently denied as well... maybe will return us as off-in-lieu.

Monday. we were expecting EX LION which is a bridge survey mission. However we didnt expect it to start so early like 8am! We got turned out and OC dropped a bomb... 'The current PCs will be the exercise PCs'. I almost flipped. Got a brief order and had to plan and give orders to my men... the process is painful... super rush and you have to multi-task. My lunch and dinner were packed :( Luckily the whole exercise went smoothly despite the instructors gave us surprise scenarios to see how to handle situational changes... it was rather easy i must say, have to produce a written report also, sian.

Thursday. The whole week was rather slack with lots of lecture from the chemical def and explosive units... interesting but i had to constantly check my platoon to see if anyone dozes off... got to know that i was charged for a silly mistake. i kept a diskette which stored the platoon nominal roll for turn out which was a contraband item... whats worse was the instructors knew i had the diskette but still without signing the letter of authority.. possession of such storage devices is still chargable... got 7 days of stoppages of leave = confined over the weekend. The instructors who knew abt my case all shook their heads when they saw me... 'why you so suay'. luckily the charge will not affect my performance in the course. phew.

Actually confinement for me was a good thing. firstly i could spend quality time studying for EX WOLF and upcoming major exercises... normally at home i wont be studying as hard. One of my instructors was damn nice... gave us the key to one of the room where there was tv and computer. I was made the IC for the SOL group which consisted of 8 men. We were tasked to write an essay of 1500 words on officership each, clean toilet and do up boards for the upcoming EX WOLF.

Sunday. It was a sleepless night... Was disappointed with some of my platoon mates who booked in so late like 2200 onwards to pass us the stuff to do the boards. It was a tedious process... In the end, everyone could sleep only after 0230after all the boards have been done... of course everyone was grumbling they should not have booked in early (supposed book in timing was monday morning 6am) and the lack of sleep...

I am quite happy with my performance in admin part of the course... My CPC tour and the tasks OC gave me, i managed to do it without instructors screaming at me... perhaps except area cleaning.. but that one really no choice. every set of appointment holders sure kena gan but sometimes it's really no time to clean or it will still be dirty after cleaning.

Arghz my bunk is in a mess... that was one thing i didnt do which was to pack up during my confinement. Mr NICE instructor also booked in on sunday and bought supper for the confinees... Wah we worshipped and adored him... lol

EX WOLF was nothing... I was made 'man-mode'. Was kinda disappointed cos i didnt learn much... it was an exercise for us to refresh what we have learnt and let those cross-overs to familiarise.

Then frightening experience started... i was feeling weird why OC didnt turn us out on mon when EX WOLF started... as every week confirm will have one... Also, we slept like 10pm on tuesday night... Most of them stayed up and studied for landmine warfare which was a 3-day fieldcamp-cum-ex. I was glad i didnt stay up. At about 0350, there were shoutings along the corridor. I jumped out of my bed and realised a few instructors were standing at the corridor shouting at us... It took me quite some time to realise what my cadet wing commander (CWC) wanted us to do - 7 min turn out... (not i blur but no one echoed down what the instructions were and the CWC came out after like a min later and really shouted loud enough)

Well, i think we met the timing... cos we were not made to re-do (aka samula). Then after at about 0430, they read out the appointment holders for the ex. I heaved a sigh of relief. The specialists were surprised at our turn-out for mission... cos they heard all the shouting in the parade square. lol.

Oh well, cut the story short, the minefield camp was quite slack. Except building one takes about 5 hours, super tedious... our first ground was not even solid ground... my sector was waterlogged... full of mud. i had to use my bare hands to lay and arm the mines... into the MUD! disgusting. Was really scared of soil diseases and bacteria... They can kill, you know! My boots and uniform gone with the mud. As i digged the hole, i got to taste the splash of mud... :)

We worked throughout the night and only got to sleep inside a tonner with another 19 men after 0100 in dirty uniforms and smelly feet as everyone was 'airing' theirs. In the morning we were supposed to retrieve all the mines. I got problem getting back one of the mines... i was freaked out... and got cut by something as i frantically dug my hands into the mud everywhere just to find the last mine. It bled quite badly... 2LT Gilbert jokingly told the medic to amputate if it's serious and i dont find it funny though.

Luckily i found the last one. phew. platoon 1 could not account for the last mine by stipulated time, they had to samula! the last thing you ever want is to re-do the mindfield... After being tekan by the OC, the OC asked them to re-do the whole minefield. We were shocked but nevertheless we were asked to proceed with our next task which was to build a mine cluster. Our chief instructor suggested to do it in a more practical way so we had to dig from crusher-run, gravel roads! We digged until the pick axe and changkol landed in all sorts of position and we made all sorts of noises, groaning, yelling, cursing and swearing.

By evening, we were made to lift the mine cluster after platoon 1 had seen our sample... cos i think they got 'samula' again. This time i think it was for their slow response...

We then proceeded to night marking... i mean training in saf sometimes can be quite tedious... i mean if you can shoot and take azimuth (bearing) at night which was more challenging.. of course you can do it in the day... why do one at night and in the day? We started building at 2200 but luckily the instructors 'samula' us when we were still in our marking phase... cos the direction of minefield was off... WE re-did at 0030 and finished building at 0555. The instructors were impressed with us... Not much sleep leh, what you think... The ground was evening worse... Super muddy and the area was much bigger = build a bigger minefield.

After breakfast, we could see platoon 1 running the circumference of their minefield... i just shook my head, why they so suay? Then warrant choy came to inspect our minefield... Super lucky x2, he inspected one of our lanes and it was very well done, measurements were accurate and the digging were up to the required dimensions... We were told to lift the minefield :) As we lifted the minefield, we saw platoon 1 also lifting theirs... i thought we should out-do platoon 1. In the end, i came to know, they 'samula' again. *faints*. This time dunno why. Must go check with them. poor jeremy and samuel... lol..

We also had our scare... We could not find our last mine... We had to send 5 men to surrender their mine prodders and prone on the mudfield using bayonet to find the last mine. Well, i just went along... anyway dirty already, what's there to be afraid of. But by lunch time, we managed to find it back. phew. i mean our platoon was really on lucky streak. firstly we lost a metal pin of 30cm long during fencing for mine cluster... secondly, we lost a base plate during fencing for minefield. thirdly, we could not account for 2 safety clips. Lastly two of our guys lost their mine prodders. But at the end of the day, all were retrieved. We started unpacking all the stuff and checked for stores... By 1600, we even got the field latrines and admin tentages dismantled, ready to go. Platoon 1 was still kena tekan, in push-up positions... As we left the place, we saw platoon one still building! this time was mine cluster on softer ground. phew. but still, i bet they were super demoralised or as they claimed numb, they can even build a minefiled with their eyes closed.

So here i am, breathing in the air i missed last week. lol. Tempo picking up, i am more than half-way through the course... field fortification coming up and EX MUSANG... after which local summary exercise EX UNICORN and off to Crescendo-thailand...

Wish me luck :)
Dip me in chocolate and call me a dessert

Hit this *Lifehouse - You and Me

Check this out *



CTW instructors at mooncake festival celebration while we are doing our planning ex!
from left to right:

LTA Clifford Lai(ORD-ing), LTA Lee Swee Guan (weird laughing noise), 2LT Ngan Guoyang (pissed me off initially at the APB test but now my friend liao after my CPC tour, lol), 2LT Kenneth (offering his ass aka the punisher: See footnote), 2LT Fong Yifeng (Nice Guy, the above mentioned), LTA Kelvin Lee (everytime he appears on fri night = we book out on sat morning), Warrant Choy (aka appointment-holders confiner), 2LT Gilbert (always seem to find trouble for me: See footnote), LTA Irene Tan (super nice, our 2IC, she's like lavender-relieve stress), LTA Benson Tan (in black, always megawatt smile, he made headlines man), CPT Ong Wee Kwang (who can forget this name, our dearest OC and his famous black car which we always hoped not to see), 2LT Lim Her-yi (nags a lot like cartoon like dat... but gd intentions la), MAJ Michael Yau (our chief instructor-very knowledgable, funny man)

Footnote:
Punisher? He made cadets write lots of essay... like 5000 words on rifle aftr he stunned one of the cadets. 1500 words on why first aid dressing was seen protroding out of the pocket... etc

find trouble? He stunned my key during one of the stand-by and made me write essay... if u remember one of my previous posts. He was the one who conducted the stand-by universe and found the diskette... The not-so-funny instructor :)

Effect of photo: hopefully the next time i curse and swear or complain about certain instructor, you can give me your moral support by throwing darts? :)

..:: 345. The One With Depression ::..

Friday night was the last night i have with ah ma. I chose to stay up the whole night, let my dad and my relatives sleep as they had been kept busy since tuesday. My coursemates had a 5-hr stand-by bed and area that led to them having to book out on sat morning, instead of fri night. Then, heard lots of stories or rather updates for the week from my 2 buddies...

I was quite disgusted to know that my OC actually yelled at my instructor who gave me leave till sat. Why so long? i mean, i wanted to go back on thur but wasnt allowed as it was live firing and i might not be able to concentrate. Fair enough... Fri was important as it was last day of prayers so obviously i cant book in. Tue i booked out to see my ah ma in icu who fought on till wed when she had seen everyone she wanted... So now tell me which part of the compassionate leave that you think is too long? I know that the OC maybe concerned that i might miss out a lot of things and he would not want to put me out of course for that. Maybe i'm just feeling sensitive and edgy...

Sat. where the journey ends. Everyone gathered to see ah ma off... As we put flowers on top of the coffin, to the dismantling of the tentage, to the coffin being lifted, there was lots of tears... I fought back my tears, believing that she would be able to rest in peace if i did not cry. As everyone walked behind the vehicle carrying the coffin, the music that came out from the vehicle, i was 'shattered'. The vehicle had to make a planned route which bypass my ah ma's house... Everytime after visiting her, she would stand at the window or the corridor to wave us goodbye as we head to take bus. I looked up at the window and i realised what i'm feeling now is exactly what she's feeling everytime she sees us home.

Mandai Crematorium and Columbarium. As we moved off, it started to rain heavily... I chose to believe that someone must be crying over her... I saw the digital screen showing the service hall number and the name of the deceased. I just shook my head and headed to SH 3. Inside we gave our last prayer and i could see water dripping down from the photoframe. it really looked like my ah ma was crying... Especially it was drop by drop and from her eyes...

The door of the furnace opened Didnt want to use incinerator as the dictionary mentioned 'wastes'... As the coffin inched automatically into the furnace, shrieks, yelling (you know what i mean) just came out uncontrollably... My auntie collapsed to the floor after yelling 'ah ma, rest in peace ar... you left us suddenly without giving us any warning...' and all the crying just amplified.

Till now, i think i am having some kind of depression. It goes on and off... Perhaps it's the guilt? or perhaps it's the emptiness? Everytime i see an elderly, i would think of my ah ma. Seeing a couple bringing their grandmother for lunch, i wished i could do that and immediately i lost my appetite... But when lunch was at MacDonalds, I wish i could tell the couple to have healthier food instead. As i watched the grandma eat, it reminds me of my ah ma having problems eating with her dentures...

I hope i can recover soon... I dont want to affect my performance, neither do i want it to be an excuse i could not perform... For the commissioning parade, i could not remember whether we are allowed to bring 5 guests... My family makes up 4 guests and the last guest on the list which used to be filled is now vacant...

..:: 344. The One With Wake ::..

Well 'hosting' a wake was never a thing i wanted to do... relatives started 'pouring' in... Some of whom i have never seen before. Darn, i hate those young teenagers who came and waved the joss sticks half-heartedly... Somemore dressed so inappropriately... At the wake, i cant help but think, is it that a person has to die then everyone will gather and catch up with each other? Seriously, some 'distant' relatives are really 'distant' cos i have never seen them at all... Probably i might have offered them seats in the public transport without realising we are related...

I was kept busy serving those who came over, based on tradition, my dad and i had to kneel everytime there is anyone offering incense sticks... Everyone confirm say 'wah, they all grow so big and tall liao... wow, all grown up liao...' whenever my sisters and i visit any table... The only question they could engage us was 'what are you doing now?' Then they will proceed talking in hokkien which the three of us understood but no inputs...

Yesterday was a new experience, i stayed overnight, keeping myself awake, at the same time prepare myself not to sleep during exercises... all the way till morning then i could sleep... beside a coffin. woo... there was nothing to be scared of... it's still my grandmother...

Today was the start of prayers... i was shocked at the sudden influx of people.. abt forty plus... young and old... i thought what happened... they were volunteers of this organisation where they go around giving prayers... Volunteers as old as my grandmother were there... As they were chanting, i thought of my grandmother... three things abt her that would make me weep instantly... firstly, the thought that everything happened so fast... she was fit and healthy... out of the sudden, she just left. it's still so hard to believe. secondly, the look at her picture... all the love and concern she had showered on me (and my sisters). Everytime i disagree with my parents, i would ask her for advice... She would normally have the final say... Now, if i go visit my uncle, i would definitely feel the emptiness.. just like today, i went with my dad and uncle to dismantle her bed... Now, that vacancy = a hole in my heart... lastly, there was so much things i havent done or say to her as a grandson... I guess is this sudden emptiness that is upsetting me... So much to do and say ...

My eyes kinda swollen frm the crying... As they were chanting, i really could not control myself... For all that she had done, i had not been a gd grandson. The first time i saw her unveiled from the white cloth from the mortuary, i would never forget that sight... She has shrunk so much, bony fingers, her head tilted back with her tongue sitting in the gap for her dentures... The sound of the machine whenever there was flunctuations... The pumping of air from the respirator... the rising and falling of her chest and the gasping of air... the green straight line...

It still hurts after so long...

I wasnt as strong as i thought i would be...

..:: 343. The One With Demise ::..

Yup. My grandmother passed on at CGH this afternoon after battling since monday morning... She suffered a stroke and her pulse and heartbeat dropped half when i visited her today compared to yesterday.

Yesterday evening, my wing SM told me to book out immediately cos my grandmother's condition was critical. my heart dropped. i ran all the way out to get a cab, praying intensely thru out the ride. Lots of things flashed thru my mind...

About a month ago, i began pestering my sis to accompany me to visit my grandmother... dunno where this sudden feeling to visit her came over me... In the end, two weeks ago, i did. Just last week, i already planned to have breakfast with my grandmother but unfortunately, appt holders had to book in at 1pm as area cleaning was not well done.

Regret is definitely too late... I dun blame the wing SM for making us book in early... As 'youngsters', we always think we have a lot of time to do things but i forgot my grandmother does not. Initially, i was sad, but now the more i think, the more i am depressed...

Whats worse, she treated us (my sisters and i) the best cos my dad is her eldest son. I spent my childhood with my grandmother... She worked her life to get my uncle into university... when we were young,we used to have about 5-6 meals per day... Breakfast, 'after-market' meal, lunch, tea break, dinner, supper... She still cooks food for us, but my younger sis got the chance to taste the last meal she ever cooked... She wanted to cook for me on sunday, the usual day.. but i had live firing...

Now whenever i do area cleaning, i would think of her... she cleaned the whole house by herself... and its really super clean... you will not find any dust... i really enjoy that clean environment and everything is just so neat... Every weekend, she would prepare tonic...

Every weekend, she yearns for us to pay her a visit, to talk to her, keep her accompany... Sonetimes when i am out there having fun, i didnt stop and think how lonely it is to just watch tv with a dog... especially when my uncle is a workaholic...

I cried... very badly... cos i remembered the last time i ever see her talking, she still gave me 30 bucks even when i rejected her offer. It was not a very fulfilling visit as that day i had to rush my homework to book in.

In the hospital, i stood by her bedside, telling her to get up, wake up... told her that i am hungry, i miss her food... but its all too late...

i was at the wake in the afternoon, my uncle's dog, gave funny noises, staring at my grandmother with watery eyes... as though it was being slaughtered... that noise i could recognise, the dog misses my grandmother... hearing that, my family and my relatives broke down...

I will never forget the day i visited her, she felt me and said 'le jin ku bo lai liao...' (you haven been here for a long time) the touch i would never get for the rest of my life...

i miss my grandmother...

..:: 342. The One With Ex HIPPO ::..

this week has been mentally and physically tiring... Had a drill session on mon morning... tiring sia.. wing SM said he wanted to drill us so that when we go back to OCS, the training there will be nothing. Mon raining so SOC was postponed till friday. luckily it was postponed, ya know why later... had a lecture on recce... i got 82% for my test the next day.. hee.. happy :)

then planning ex started on tue... it was intensive.. we got a turn out but there wasnt a nid to lay everything out. We received our warning order and started on our planning... From 2pm, we planned all the way till 8pm to know that we had to 'samula' aka re-do the ex... cos our OC was not happy with our performance. His 3 golden rules: treat the ex like in real ops; say what you mean, mean what you say; discipline. We seemed to be unable to meet timing cos lots of planning and writing... When we present in front of OC, confirm break into cold sweat. he wld zoom in to each word you say. then when he shoots a question, most of us will be stunned... i have compiled a list of what pointers to take note of... i copied like 8 pages of notes for the ex. took me 2 hrs to compile...

interesting sights you will see after 12am... people start to do things slowly... some stoned... some dozed off if they were not doing things for more than 10secs? We received our orders again around 2am. Can see people opening their mouth kinda wide... we planned till 430am then sleep. woke up at 530am for breakfast then continue planning. my greatest achievement was that i didnt close my eyes throughout the ex... unless its sleeping time... must thank all the red cross training i used to have... planning in the late nights... still remember i had evac lesson ard 12mn and pitch tents ard 2am + ... then still got turn-outs in the middle of the night when i was a cadet... Some concuss until u wake them, they also cannot stay awake for the next 5 secs.

We ended everything on thur night. got a good night sleep... but fri SOC was hell... had to do an orientation run then some of the obstacles there seemed higher than in OCS SISPEC... first time i didnt clear my swing traine aka monkey bar. cos it was just too slippery. no grip... after so many people with sweaty palms... i tried 5 times and i had no energy liao... bottle dropped out again. must buy rubber band to secure liao...

something shocking happened too... OC actually stripped pple off their ranks when they couldnt complete SOC... i understand his rationale in if a commander cannot do what your man do, then something is wrong. However, it was the first time after like 3 mths since we did SOC... Should at least give them a chance. Lucky me was chosen to take over the role of CPC. well dejavu... back to shouting and more shouting... no more man mode liao... worried about turn out cos i have to ensure everyone's equipment is servicable... and CO parade on 2 sept... stressed... and bridging CBRE, EOD all coming back...

Ex Zenia was fun... working with the OC-trainees at advanced training wing is interesting... the whole of next week is planning and i love it! fri cohesion day. go east coast, cycle and run for 12km. still got abt 13 weeks more in SOCE...

..:: 341. The One With Saturday ::..



I'm glad my friend invited me to this play. It was a superb one, i could not stop laughing thru'out the show. Now i know students in NTU SCI mostly drama-mama...

The Sex Life of Snails
The Odd Couple
Counting The Ways

after i had laughed my heart out, i desperately needed it back...

Then went over to Sun Plaza to watch The Maid with melvin, samuel, jeremy. i felt so stressed watching it. lol. cos they built up the tension so high, i guess my heart beat went up... several gd scenes, finally they are improving or honing their skills to shoot a gd horror movie. but several scenes really no link. perhaps they tried to link up old wives' tales to make the movie more 'heart-throbbing'. For the cold sweat and the irritating sound whenever there is the presence of the ghost, i give the movie 3/5 stars :)



During the Chinese Seventh Month, the gates of hell open and spirits are let loose upon an unsuspecting world. You know the story... NOt for the faint hearted. O_o

..:: 340. The One With 7th Week In SOCE ::..

...the best form of welfare is to ask you to shower after they turn u out before u book out...

after playing game (something like CS but lousier of course) at the computer room, we were instructed to change to our book-out attire, do area cleaning and stuff... prior to the computer lesson aka pc gaming i showered... our OC was DSO (duty staff officer so he had to stay in camp thru'out = more time to 'play' with us. so he 'gamed' with us and turned us out. i had to dig into the pile of sweaty uniform and refill my bottles which we had to empty before book out (great isnt it?).

Obviously, we could not meet the timing... we had to pack everything up, run up and come down in clean fatigue = cap plus fucking wet uniform :) then run up again, get our stuff and lay everything out in 7 mins.

oh ya, we had to be in pumping position and the OC talked for abt 5 mins? quoted (roughly)... this is how you feel when you are demoralised... and this will be how your men feel if they have to keep doing something again and again because you are unable to lead them well...

remember one time we had to everything in everything out within one min and we did like more than 10 times... he also mentioned about 'if you find a purpose in doing something you will be able to do it (meet the timing)'

i must say we are learning things from the OC in a hard way.

end of story. not really complaining... cos i'm kinda numb doing all the turn-outs. i just find joy in doing all the shack stuff... bring it on.

thur had a full day of lectures... i was quite upset on fri when they changed appointments... i didnt get one yet. haiz. that means my field PC appointment will come soon. next week we have a planning ex... i always sucked at being field PC.. perhaps low confidence and i always have the feeling i know less than others... But admin appointment is what i normally do in CCA... meeting timing, maintaining discipline... no sweat.

fri morning ippt... lol. my first station chin-ups could only hit 8. definitely demoralising cos it meant i couldnt get gold = no $200... yes i can always try again. But sianz... i'm glad my 2.4km run timing got better each time i run. I become so numb... in running. just like doing turn out. i aint using my brain nor focussing... just let my legs run. Perhaps in that way i dun feel shack mentally...

okayz, infantry guys not free so today cant meet them for farewell dinner :( going for a theatre play wif my fren... oh well, tml for mugging my precis and getting ready for a siong week ahead. the rest of the engrs joining us in two weeks time. cant wait.

everyone will be hoping to be the last CWC (cadet wing comd) cos the previous batch one was the sword of honour. but then again, would it be the same for our batch?

..:: 339. The One With Shopping Spree ::..

Pay came today and gone rather fast. Firstly, i had to pay for the limited edition watches i had ordered for my parents. Then i had to get ipod shuffle. was glad to get free accessories from the vouchers i got from buying the watches. Lastly, i had to extend my contact so i thought why not get a new phone. Hence i got N6201 for 40+ only. Still got rebate :) A phone with bluetooth but no camera -_- anyway i cant use camera phone for the next 1.5 yrs?

yesterday went chinablack again. initially there was no one at the dance floor. until about eleven plus, i regretted saying the dance floor was empty... it was damn packed until at certain point, i just stood at the dance floor for ten mins for people to pass... first time i had to 'retire' at the side cos i cant stand squeezing with people. Actually supposed to go gortam penthouse but no tickets... it was a jc party... i guess i would refrain from cb for a while...

tml got army family day... lol showing the public army lifestyle? army got life meh? sian booking in doesnt seem as fun as it was back in ocs... maybe its the pple at SOCE? back in ocs, i nvr dread booking in... with all my frenz bitching after RO and during breakfast the next day...

sad today overslept... didnt go sentosa. haiz... i miss the tan and didnt EXERCISE! arghz... my chin-ups.. die...

tml watching charlie and choco factory with my sis. hee... really enjoy these family times... and not to forget to visit my grand mother.

..:: 338. The One With Random Thots ::..

i forgot to add that last week, i was totally off... firstly mon we had 5 min stand-by bed so we had to rush up to the bunk and tidy up. when i opened my door i forgot to take the key out. As expected, one of the new instructors being guai lan took my key and asked me to see him at night. Whats worse, he opened my precis cupboard where it was supposed to hold books but i left my glasses, contacts there. Got a lecture from my wing sergeant major. :(

one of the mornings, i had to fall in without locking my door cos i couldnt find my key. sucky feeling, hence before the run i went up to check again and realised it was with my lock -_-

then one of the breakfasts, i remember reminding myself to take my stuff with me after spreading my bread. somehow i forgot, lucky my frenz kept the pass, id and key for me, cos when i went back, i couldnt find any. if not for my friend, i think if the instructors found it, i would get 3 x 7 extras.
before this, i left my id on the table but one of thestaff found it as she was checking for bread that may have turned mouldy...

close encounters man...

i had to write a 500-word essay for the key thing. damn stupid. somemore i am in charge of making sure no one misplaces his/her key and no door is to be left unlocked. if not, both parties get 7 extras aka guard duties which translates to weekend being burnt.

recently heard a lot of deaths going on. damn scary. every time i hear someone died, i would feel the chills. firstly was my friend's close friend in a bike accident. then my fren in ocs also told me, one of the cookhouse uncle also involved in a bike accident. :( treasure people ard u, i guess...

ok back to doing homework... wanna cach charlie n the choco factory and bewitched next book out. booking in tonight and out on mon night -_-

happy national day :)

..:: 337. The One With Stressful Week ::..

shall just touch on highlights of this week. had turn-out aka 7 mins on tue... had to do it 2 times and for field pack everything in in 1 min and out in 1 min. we did the everything in/out for dunno how many times until my hands become numb... then with all the sweat, we went into an air con room for 'warning order' for our mission planning exercise.

then wed plan until 0230, damn tired... whats worse was everyday morning got run... and thur we had ippt training. running 8 x 400m. i felt super dizzy... well at least most pple felt the same way.

this week has been very meaningful and i learnt quite a lot this week. all the planning and presentation... cos our chief instructor and another major were there. both were knowledgable and i can really learn without stress... OC super particular with AOP, everything also like cannot... everytime he comes in, we would all keep quiet. afraid his mouth would come out '7 mins'.

quite sian. book out still got lots of homework to do... OC was in high spirits today... whole day his lecture and he ended off telling us about his army life. he turned us out again as usual but didnt 'tekan' us. he gave us a recruitment talk... impromptu... the deal after u signed on sounds really tempting... 9 mths back payment and bonuses... interest is there. mmm...

anyway was quite disturbed and upset about peer appraisal that was done on tue... sometimes i also wondered how pple do the grading? i just knew that i was not as good as someone who sleeps in class... mmm... time to do some reflection... perhaps i am getting too comfortable in keeping a low profile... it seems like i'm back in sispec. cant really 'bitch' as much as i'm in OCS.

2 things i fear:
presenting AOP... really need more practice
pple see me as not performing or slack when i'm just trying to stay low.

my fave in america next top model cycle 4.. haiz but she didnt win :(